When I was in high school in the early 80s I really wanted a class ring. My best friend had one and I just thought they were unique and special. My parents, however, had a different notion. They gave me an option to buy either a class ring or a class sweater.
I picked the class sweater. (Oh well.)
A couple of weeks ago my son brought home paperwork to buy a class ring. At first I balked and then I looked at the brochure and asked him a few questions. Bottom line, he really wanted one.
After a day or two to ponder the idea we decided to let him have the ring. He spent days designing the cut, the side designs, and the color of the ring itself.
A couple of hundred dollars later he put in an order for his ring.
I spent an evening chatting with a neighbor recently and she said her son asked for a class ring too and her and her husband decided not buy him one...too much money (true, I guess in today's economic climate); would most likely give it away to some girl (seriously? Are we in 1954? Do guys even do this anymore?? et me just say that heads will friggin roll if my son gives his ring to some random girl!!); he won't wear it after high school (I once had a boss in this thirties who still wore his ring, I thought it was kinda sexy).
Anyway.
I sat and thought a bit about the reasons why this couple turned their son down on his request for a class ring...understanding completely that we as parents make all kinds of different decisions in relation to our own needs and family dynamics...and wondered if we should have passed as well.
And then I came up with this: while not maybe the best time to spend over two hundred dollars on a ring for a 16-year old we decided that THIS request we could easily do and say YES to when there have been plenty of no's and plenty of things that we have not lavished upon him. For instance, we didn't buy him a car (and therefore not paying for the gas/insurance/repairs that go along with it). He also doesn't have his own cell phone (the Ipod he paid for with money he saved for over a year). And, we don't hand over our debit card (OMG) and send him willy-nilly ANYWHERE to buy whatever his little heart desires whenever he feels he is entitled to some goodies.
Am I justifying? Maybe. So far, high school has been one big open checkbook writing free fall. But, I kinda remember my own high school experience being that way too. And, there is light at the end of the tunnel: One more year. Of course, by then my middle child will just be starting...(crap).
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